Why, We Do the Work We Do…
As advocates we do our jobs because we strongly believe in empowerment and change; not because of the pay. This job takes a lot. It takes understanding and compassion. It means learning to leave judgment at the door and putting aside our own convictions and beliefs. It means knowing that we are not going to be saviors for every case we come across; it means knowing the reality of what victims face and that some will never leave; it means knowing we may end up with secondary trauma and feel that we are “at a loss” when we are lacking resources and community support, or arguing about policies that do more harm than good.
However, as advocates we also feel a great sense of accomplishment when we see a client become a survivor with strength and empowerment; when legislators listen and change laws; when we build collaborations and partnerships in order to help fight this senseless crime; when we stand with a community and say “this not the end, this is just the beginning!”
The above statement was one of the best compliments my colleague, Elisa C., and I received this weekend after we spent our Saturday morning speaking to a group of 60 women from a minority community. After 2 and ½ hours of discussing the topic of domestic violence, this amazing group said this was not the end, this was just the beginning. They were clear that this discussion did not end at 1:00 pm – it was the start of something bigger for them. For them, it was taking what they learned and applying techniques for starting the conversation on intimate partner violence not only with other women, but with teens and MEN.
Much of the feedback we received that day inspires us to continue the work.but there was one story in particular that truly touched our hearts. After the presentation, one the participants shared with us that she was actually not supposed to be there. She was filling in for someone who could not attend the presentation – that Saturday happened to be her day off. She shared with us that she was dealing with an abusive relationship- a relationship, which she has been trying to leave for some time. She was on her seventh try (a survivor will try and leave an abusive situation an average of seven times before leaving for good) She stated that not only did the presentation assure her that she was not crazy, but it also enabled her to really gather information about her local safe house and support groups in the area.
It is moments like these that enable us to remember survivors’ accomplishments and not become jaded by the many difficulties and losses we face this work. That moment and many others are what assure us as advocates of the value of our work. This work is about reaching and educating others and giving communities the tools to fight for the right to live a safe, healthy lives.- To be safe in one’s own home is perhaps the most basic idea, yet for thousands, it remains out of reach.. This work is about making sure the cycle of violence breaks. There is change happening in our communities that we are honored to be a part of, won’t you join us?
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